"Why is Mom so on edge all the time?
It feels like I’m always walking on eggshells. I can’t wait to
graduate and get out of here."
“I know, right? I don’t even like
coming back home anymore.”
I stood frozen in the hallway as I overheard my kids talking.
I was on my way to bring in some cookies before we started decorating the Christmas tree.
My oldest son was home from college over Thanksgiving break.
He and Brittany, a sophomore in high school, were chatting in hushed tones in the game room, unaware that I could hear them.
It killed me to hear that Brittany wanted out of the house so bad…
And that Ben didn’t even want to be here…
Because of ME.
If you’ve ever experienced the horror that YOU were the cause of your child’s pain…
Then you know what I’m talking about.
But what she said next was the arrow to my heart that made me want to burst into a million pieces.
“I’ve been praying so hard for her, but
He’s obviously not answering my prayers.
I’m not even sure God’s real anymore.”
My chest heaved as my hand shot to my mouth to stop the sob that was about to explode out of me.
Tears began pouring down my face.
Frozen, I stood there just looking down at the carpet.
That’s when I realized a hard truth
They weren’t wrong.
I knew I’d been “edgy” for far too long.
It seemed like there was always this low-grade agitation just simmering under the surface.
Have you ever made that realization about yourself?
Clearly, it had taken a toll on my family.
My family must have seen me as that “Ice Queen” from Narnia.
I was driving my family away from me…
The last thing any mother would want.
I thank God every day that I discovered a simple, powerfully effective solution that turned my low-grade agitation…
Into real-life joy.
And it’s something that can work for you, too.
But it’s probably not what you think.
See, even though I’d heard countless sermons on “joy”...
It felt like the mountain of pressure and stress I was living under simply chased any joy away.